


Gambler's Fallacy

by Tisnotonfire



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Growing Up Together, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-26
Updated: 2019-05-26
Packaged: 2020-03-17 14:47:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18967411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tisnotonfire/pseuds/Tisnotonfire
Summary: The illusion of control: is the tendency for people to overestimate their ability to control events; for example, it occurs when someone feels a sense of control over outcomes that they demonstrably do not influence.





	1. Chapter 1

**October 23rd, 2008**  
**Age 7 & 9**  
The first time Jisung sees Jaemin, he is 7 years old.

It’s October and the air that surrounds his home and crawls under the cracks in the windows is cold (not as cold as in winter, but enough so that Jisung has to wear socks when he’s getting out of his house). The leaves of the trees are colour amber and dance in toasted, golden copper spirals that fall on the freshly cut lawn of his yard.

Jaehyun is reading a thick-capped book, leaning against the tree that leans against the back fence of his house, and Jisung runs and jumps on the brown piles of leaves that are stacked around his brother’s feet.

Cop, cop, cop. The soles of his shoes tread again and again. Tac, tac, tac. Jump, jump, jump. Poof. The leaves rise like flecks of dust and are silhouetted against the clear afternoon sky every time Jisung’s little feet covered in striped socks fall on the heaps. They rise and dance and make noises while the wind carries them away.

“Hyung look, I can jump higher than before, look, look.” Jisung runs and jumps as the tips of his fingers carefully touch the almost naked branch that slopes down on the tree. When his feet touch the ground, he smiles proudly and looks at his brother. “Did you see that? The other time we were competing I couldn’t touch it, but now I can,” he says, bouncing enthusiastically on the tip of his heels.

His older brother looks at him over the worn pages of his book and smiles softly at him, his eyes brimming with affection, and the pride and satisfaction and exhilaration within Jisung grows and spins and fills him from the tip of his feet to his neck, “Well done, Jisung,” he says.

“Do you think I can reach your record, Hyung?”

Jaehyun laughs, low, soft and genuine in his throat, and his smile grows. “Of course, Jisung. Just practice a little more.”

Jisung nods. Practice. Of course. He will practice more and he will make his brother proud. He will practice until he can go beyond his brother’s record. He will practice until he can touch the tip of the tree.

.

 

It’s close to four in the afternoon when the truck arrives. The sun’s rays rest on the street and the sky is a mixture of orange, blue, white and gold. Jaehyun has already gone into the house to finish his homework and Jisung is still jumping on piles of leaves and running around the fence at the moment when the huge truck stops at the side of his house. It is gigantic, so large that it covers the entire extension of the other house and half of his own. The words ‘Red Chair Movers’ are printed with red letters on the white surface of one side of the truck.

Jisung frowns when he sees it. He walks and leans over the fence to look more closely. There is a woman with long brown hair that falls in waves below her delicate waist, and a tall raven haired man besides her trying to load several boxes into his hands. The woman seems to be saying something to someone, looking down and talking with eccentric, exaggerated gestures; she doesn’t seem annoyed, but she is too energetic, neither his father nor mother would say anything to him or his brother that way, even if it was a scolding. Jisung moves, but he still cannot tell who she’s talking to. Maybe if he moved a little… to the left…

“What are you doing, Jisung?” His mother’s voice comes floating behind him. The footsteps of his shoes on the messy path of leaves crunching under his feet. There is a pause while Jisung tries to lean a little more. “Oh, so they’re here,” his mother mutters, stopping right behind him. “I must tell your father, darling, but dinner will be ready soon. Get in the house in a few minutes, okay?”

Jisung nods, looking at her, although he’s a bit confused. “So they’ve arrived”? Why does his mother say it as if she knew them? Jisung is very sure that he wouldn’t forget someone like them.

Jisung turns his head back to pay attention to the scene and, when he does it, there is a child standing right in the middle of the path to the porch of the house next to his own. He is quite tall, probably a little taller than Jisung. His eyes were speckled with hints of gold as the sun shone through, Jisung can distinguish them from where he is. Before he can pay much more attention, his mother calls him from within the house.

“Jisung, dinner!”

“Coming!” he says, but when he turns back to look again, the child is no longer there.

.

.

.

The next time Jisung sees the boy, its two days later. Jisung has gone out into the yard to play the day after their first meeting, and has leaned curiously over the fence to look at the other house, but all that were there were boxes scattered around the garden. Even the truck was gone. Instead of it, it was a small, red car laying on the sidewalk. Next to it was a small yellow-coloured bicycle too.

But then, it turns out that the tall raven haired Man is someone important.

“A subordinate of the forces from Guangju. Excellent history. And same with his wife,” says his father just after announcing the important dinner he organized. “He is someone impeccable. We need more men like him in the force. I want you to be nice, guys.”

Jisung doesn’t understand much, but he doesn’t complain while he is putting on his elegant-shoes. Jaehyun leans a little to his side.

“Of course, father,” he answers, and Jisung nods at the same time.

Hours later, Jisung is standing next to his brother in front of the door. His mother is wearing a pretty, elegant and long, black dress that stands out against her white porcelain skin; heels decorate her feet. His father is very well dressed too.

When they ring the bell a second time, his father opens the door. His mother smiles kindly and Jisung looks curiously at the people standing in the doorway.

They are the same ones from the other time. A tall man and the woman with long, brown hair; her expression is mischievous and her gestures are energetic, and when she speaks she is too loud; the opposite of her husband, who is much calmer (his serene expression, pleasant and soft smiles). The child is also there, bouncing on his heels right in the middle of his parents. At this distance, Jisung can observe him better and pay attention to the details. He looks more like his father than his mother. He has brown eyes, big and bright; his skin is the colour of sand that burned hot under his feet on the beach.

They all stand out in some way, Jisung thinks when he sees them. They are too bright, glowing, radiant and cheerful colours. Like tornadoes and storms and loud laughter.

His father presents them both and shakes hands with the man. Na Hyunsoo, he says. My wife, Hyeji and my son, Jaemin.

Jaemin.

For a moment, their eyes meet again.

And Jisung is not good with people, much less with children around his age. It’s hard to deal with someone when you don’t really want to. So no, he’s not good with people, and it’s not that he cares that much, because he has a dog and Jaehyun, and he doesn’t need anything else, but for a moment, Jaemin’s eyes are so impressive and they have something that makes Jisung think that he will actually like him, that makes him think this time could be different.

That they could be friends.


	2. Chapter 2

Jaemin is sitting in front of his TV, on the floor, surrounded by a thick woollen blanket that his mother keeps in Jisung’s closet for the times he stays to sleep because yes, there are many times that he stays over to sleep. Sometimes his two parents are busy working for ungodly hours, so Jaemin stays and gets involved in movie marathons with him before going to sleep. It’s more fun than he wants to admit, and Jaemin lets him choose the movie they’re going to start almost always, so he doesn’t complain so much when Jisung goes into his room. His parents are downstairs in the dining room talking and Jaehyun is helping his and Jaemin’s mother with the food.

“Mom let me have some moon cakes,” he says, leaving the plate on the floor and sitting next to him.

“Great!” Jaemin doesn’t take his eyes off the screen as he gropes for the plate. Jisung takes a cookie and places it in his hands because, seriously, that could last for hours. “Thank you, Nana.” He smiles, putting the treat in his mouth.

Jisung takes a cookie too and looks at the screen. The truth is that it's undeniably freezing at Jisung's house, and his socks are not working, because his feet still feel cold. Maybe he should…

“I bet I would be awesome in Quidditch.”

Jisung turns to look at him.

“Hm?”  
Jaemin points to the screen, with another piece of mooncake in his hand. “Quidditch. I bet I would be awesome at it.”  
Jisung snorts. “You like Harry Potter?”  
Jaemin blinks. “Don’t you?” Jisung remains silent for a moment, and it’s enough time for Jaemin to smile.  
“I knew you liked it, you have a snitch on your bookcase don’t you? That’s why I picked this movie.”  
Jisung takes his knees and hugs them to his chest. He grimaces. “Are you always this nosy?”

“Well,” Jaemin says, shrugging his shoulders inside the huge blanket bubble. He smiles, “You’re the only person that’s close to me, I have to know what you like, right?”  
Jisung places his chin against his knees. “I guess.”  
_You’re the omly person that’s close to me._  
Jisung doesn’t know why that phrase causes something warm and unsettling to pull in his stomach. Jisung wonders why a boy this kind and amiable would choose Jisung as the person closest to him and it makes him wonder why he doesn’t talk about his other friends. Now that Jisung thinks about it, Jaemin seldom talks about himself at all, so despite their closeness, Jaemin can read him like an open book whilst Jaemin is still an enigma to him.

 

Jisung turns to look at him. Jaemin’s big eyes glow with the brightness of the television screen. He loses interest in the movie and focuses on Jaemin’s facial expressions. He learnt over time that Jaemin is an extremely emotive person and everything Jaemin does amuses him. 

In the end, they keep eating mooncakes and watching Harry Potter and then Home Alone (Jaemin cries with that movie all the time. “He lost his whole family, Sungie!”, “He didn’t lose it you moron, they just left without him.”, “That’s even sadder!”) Until they are called for dinner.

 

 

 

Jisung 12 years old and Jaemin is still noisy as hell and a bit annoying, but he has beautiful eyes and hair as fluffy as cotton candy and tanned skin and Jisung has begun to pay more attention to him. Jisung pays attention to everything he says, and the things he says don’t seem as much nonsense as before.  
Jaemin is his best friend. He goes every morning and has breakfast at home and then they go to school together by bus and Jisung likes that, even if he is not going to admit it out loud.  
Jaemin can be extremely irritating most of the time, throwing rocks at Jisung’s window, begging him to go to the café down the street to buy his favourite coffee flavoured ice cream.  
“You don’t even like coffee! And it’s the middle of the winter now, why do you want ice cream?”  
“Because coffee flavoured things taste good and it makes you feel sophisticated; like a real adult you know? And ice cream is a yearly craving for me Sungie! You have to understand baby.” He pouted.  
_Baby. Baby. Baby._  
Jisung still had trouble accustoming to this new nickname that accumulated. He felt weird and airy every time Jaemin enunciated the word slowly. He was a _still_ baby in Jaemin’s eyes even though Jaemin was also somewhat immature himself. He didn’t do his homework (and annoyed Jisung when he had homework due), enjoyed sweets and still played with his Gundam action figures.  
Jaemin is an idiot most of the time, and he likes to steal Jisung’s headphones (no, Sungie, what’s mine is yours, so I don’t steal them) and download songs, songs that are contrary to Jisung's selection of Panic! at the Disco and Pierce the Veil songs, because ‘what kind of depressing songs you have here, huh? Don’t you like to dance?’  
He also spams Jisung’s camera roll with selfies of him doing silly faces and downloads needless and crappy gaming apps. Jisung never deletes them anyways, because it has some sentimental value he supposes. 

“I can’t believe you like show tunes,” Jisung tells him once when he sees the name “I had a dream.” on his playlist.

Jaemin frowns, gestures with his arms. “Sungie, I practically live by that song, have you heard the lyrics?”

Jisung rolls his eyes, but he doesn't delete the song. He doesn’t delete any even if they don’t match the tone of his angsty tastes, because it’s Jaemin, and Jisung can tolerate whatever Jaemin likes.  
Jaemin is 14 years old and spends his free time obsessing over Superheroes and anime, which is evident through his _One Piece_ manga collection on his bookshelf and his room filled with figurines. Jaemin is like that. He is childish and he likes magic and fights and adrenaline. Jaemin cries and laughs and hugs Jisung even when he knows that personal space exists.  
Jaemin likes warm colours whilst Jisung differs. He likes to see the positive side of things and sit in the yard of his house in summer and make shapes out of clouds. He likes to annoy Jisung whilst he is doing homework and he likes to talk to Jisung and about Jisung all the time.  
Jisung doesn’t believe in magic or folklore, but if by chance the Gods and deities of some magical realm decided to add Jaemin in his life; he secretly thanks them. He’s the closest person to Jisung's heart, and Jisung doesn’t want anyone else. He would not choose anyone else.

 

Jisung is 15 years old and Jaemin is the most beautiful boy he has ever seen. The boy with the sun-kissed skin and messy chestnut hair and tantalising lips. As the seasons changed and the months flew on by, Jaemin started getting taller and his facial features grew less soft and started to mature. It was a subtle change but he noticed that Jaemin lost some of his childish nature as he started growing quieter and quieter. He’d suddenly be too busy to watch movies with him as he’d be drowning in homework. Usually, it was Jaemin pestering Jisung when he did cram school homework but the tables had turned. Jaemin slowly started gaining popularity and attention from his cohort as he naturally blended in with the large group of friends in his year level. Sometimes he’d walk with Jisung to school but sometimes he’d carpool with a group of his friends. Jaemin doesn’t make Jisung’s lunches anymore because he’d forget or because  
“I ran out of ingredients Jisung-ah!”  
Jisung thinks it fine. He doesn’t care because Jaemin is busy.  
Jisung was a terrible liar.  
He hates the wring in his heart he feels as soon as anything Jaemin related comes to mind. He hates the fact that Jaemin can have so much influence over him, that he can make him feel. He's mad and exhausted and he thinks it's for the best; Jaemin couldn’t always dote over him anyway.  
In this particular time, Jisung makes other friends; a loud and unpredictable boy transfer student from China and Lami, a girl from her cram school that he studies with.  
Jisung thinks he doesn’t need Jaemin. Jaemin is busy, always busy. Jisung thinks this is a good opportunity to take his mind off of Jaemin and to cease the butterflies in his stomach.  
_Jisung was a terrible liar._


End file.
